it seems to me that "toughen up" is mostly a kind of armouring: the one who says it does not want to deal with the sad fact of the other's hurt, so they place the burden of concealment on the victim not necessarily in order to bully them further but merely to distance themselves.
I think it's partly this and partly magical thinking. I.e., bullying shouldn't hurt, therefore it doesn't hurt, and anyone who says differently must be lying.
no subject
Date: 2011-02-25 04:29 am (UTC)I think it's partly this and partly magical thinking. I.e., bullying shouldn't hurt, therefore it doesn't hurt, and anyone who says differently must be lying.