An odd encounter

[nancylebov]

On Saturday, I did a little flea marketing, and one passerby asked my name. When I said "Nancy", she said, "What's your last name?" and when I said "Lebovitz", she said, "Oh, you're Jewish, you look Jewish, I have Jewish friends." (dialogue approximate and from memory).

I asked for her name, and she didn't give it and left.

I'm somewhat nonplussed by this. While I can sympathize with her desire to see whether her impressions are correct, I felt a bit aggressed upon, and I think the fact that she wouldn't give her name suggests that she knew her behavior was at least a little out of line.

While this wasn't a great big deal (didn't spoil my mood for the day), it's still on my mind, and I'm wondering if anyone can help me unpack the issues involved and/or has suggestions if I run into that sort of thing again.

Comments

[kip-w.livejournal.com]

The other comments seem to offer a partial solution. Another part may be that as someone in the position of a shopkeeper or salesperson, someone might feel okay in asking your name even when they wouldn't be okay at giving their own. There's a relation between buyer and seller in which sellers have by tradition made themselves a bit more available -- not quite subservient -- to the customers (who are Always Right and all that).