Duuuum, deedle deedle deedle dum deedle dum

[nancylebov]

From rassef:

The CD player is balanced on the edge of the
table, with a penny glued to the top of the disk. This causes the player
to fall over, landing on a pair of scales. As that side goes down, the
othe side goes up, striking a match which then lights a candle that
warms the air inside a dry-cleaner's bag. The bag rises, causing a
superstitious fellow outside to become alarmed, and he goes to the phone
to call the TV station. The phone completes an electrical circuit that
diverts a bus carrying the Cleveland Symphony orchestra to drive past
your house, where a replica of a traffic light permanently set on "stop"
awaits them. Meanwhile, the cleaner's bag rises to the ceiling where it
causes a thread to tighten just enough to unveil a picture of some
acorns in front of a squirrel on a treadmill. The squirrel starts
running to the acorns, causing a string to wind on a protruding axle
that unveils a blow-up photo of Bo Derek from "10" in your yard. The
orchestra members, bored from waiting at the light, will then take the
hint and begin playing "Bolero" to amuse themselves.

Then, of course, you spend the rest of the day putting the various parts
of the device back in position to wake you up the following morning,
just in time to go to bed and get some sleep and start it all over. When
the Cleveland Symphony catches on and stops taking that route, you may
substitute the Buffalo Philharmonic.

Kip W

Just to check, do any of my gentle readers not know about newsgroups?

Comments

[hughcasey.livejournal.com]

"Just to check, do any of my gentle readers not know about newsgroups?"

OK, let's just assume for a minute that I'm stupid. (No comments on the validity of that assumption, thank you.)

I'm familiar with the old USENET groups from way back when, even though I haven't accessed them in YEARS.

Is that what you mean? And can I now access them thru Google?

[thespian.livejournal.com]

same thing. but not so much of a thing anymore; traffic is way down, more people use web boards, though it had a spike when google added the groups, very few people who weren't around a decade ago are using the things these days.

[beamjockey.livejournal.com]

Is that what you mean? And can I now access them thru Google?

That's what she means. You can read them and post to them-- and, of course, search them-- through http://groups.google.com (http://groups.google.com/).

They've got traffic going back decades, back to the beginnings of Usenet for some groups.

[nancylebov.livejournal.com]

That's what I meant. I've run into enough people who either haven't heard of newsgroups or who are horrified at the idea of unmoderated public discussion groups that I thought I'd raise the question. Besides, I like getting comments.

You can read newsgroups through google, but I gather it's not a really good interface. I use a shell account from panix.com.

[madfilkentist]

Alternate question: Do any of your readers not know about Rube Goldberg's inventions?

[kip-w.livejournal.com]

Who is this "Rube Goldberg" of whom you speak? Never heard of him! I, uh, I came up with the whole thing myself.

Yeah, that's the ticket! Daniel said there should be an alarm clock that plays "Bolero," and I said they make CD alarm clocks, and he said "that's too easy," and I came up with this thing all by myself, without any help from any smartypants "Boob McNutt" cartoon guy.

That's my story, and I'm sticking to it.

[sturgeonslawyer.livejournal.com]

Know about, yes; that's where I first had the joy of your writings, back when I was working at Pacific Bell and anamalocares populated the inland seas. Alas, as I have grown older and grumpier I have found the newsgroups' s/n ratio intolerably low, moving on to mailinglists and bloggery. (More recently I have left a number of mailinglists for similar reasons. At this rate I will eventually be an e-hermit.)

[sturgeonslawyer.livejournal.com]

Ummm, that should have been "anomalocares." Eep.

[(Anonymous)]

I know about them, but have faded out as they were screwing up my ability to enjoy reading.

- Captain Button